I woke up crying this morning - I had an upsetting dream.
I dreamt about my oldest son (about 7/8 in the dream) he was as clear as day in a school sweater I knitted for him, I can see it so clearly, grey 'V' neck with red and white border around the 'V'. There had been some sort of dispute and I had had to give him up, he was in a school/institution with loads of other children but I couldn't find him. The hurt was palpable, I woke up crying and it took some time to calm down and assure myself that all my children were grown now with families of their own.
I have three happy healthy children and 9 grandchildren and two great grandchildren, I've found out, through the grapevine that there is another great grandchild on the way.
I only see my youngest son now and his two beautiful girls. He and his family are a constant source of pride for me. He still wants me in his life, the other two don't. I have to say that most of the time I can push the hurt that they have caused me to the back of my mind and get on with life. It's their choice, they have to live with it.
I wrote about family upsets here back in 2014.
Well, strange sort of post to start the day - it can only get better.